All pets are not created equal. Not every dog likes to chase after frisbees, just like not every cat likes to sit in your lap or play with felt mice. Animals are as diverse as people, with their own personalities and quirks. I have read various articles about how to get your cat to be more cuddly, sit in your lap and eat treats out of your hand. At first I tried these techniques, none of which worked. Then I started thinking, maybe she just doesn’t want to? Maybe it isn’t a matter of training her to do something, but just letting her be the way she wants to be. **Of course if she was peeing on my bed spread every day I would find a way to train her to do otherwise!

Our cat is incredibly smart and resourceful, always playful and interesting to watch. She enjoys company but also spends a good deal of time off on her own. Her affection is subtle. She is not a cat that jumps in your lap or sleeps on your chest but she waits by the door anticipating our return and won’t leave our sides when one of us is ill. When I go to someone’s house and their cat immediately jumps in my lap and starts purring like mad I can’t help but think, why won’t she do that?! But then I remember that you can’t force anyone (or any pet) to be the way you want them to be. Just like you have to love your significant other for who they are, pets deserve the same respect. When you stop comparing pets (or people) to others you gain a new admiration for the great qualities they already posess.

For the record, I won’t spend any more time worrying why my cat isn’t a lap cat or forcing her to try to be one. If I can accept that my husband’s socks will almost always end up on the floor right next to the hamper, but not quite in it, then I can accept my kitty for who she is.

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